I dreamed my job was to kill. I was reluctant with a large gun. It was my eternal sentence to murder people and animals who were sentenced to be murdered. When I missed, the deer or the man would scream and scold me for things that only I know.
And yet in all of my nightmares I have this awareness of one orchestrator who sets them all up and ties them all together, who oversees and judges all.
Exiled from my thoughts he unwittingly wreaks havoc on my subconscious.
In latest dream news, genitals crumble. Upstairs is populated by invalids and nuns. Work is bizarre. I have forgotten who my friends are, but I know they hang around these places in my mind, vaguely. Remembering does not feel important.
I had a dream the other night that I let a girl at a party borrow my new favorite earrings. I bought them on ebay when I was drunk. She disappeared and then the party ended.
Last night, I dreamed I had a tongue piercing, and I kept taking it out and putting it back in. I couldn’t believe that I couldn’t feel anything. I kept putting it through my tongue and taking it out, and each time the bar grew longer and it became more and more awkward to put the ring through, but I kept running it through the hole until I tore my tongue partially apart.
Perhaps all of the holes in me were elective at one point. Maybe I do not wish to heal.